The Postpartum Glow No One Talks About

Let’s talk about the “postpartum glow.”

You know the one — dewy skin, radiant energy, effortlessly pulled together like you just happened to have a baby and came out glowing.

Respectfully… who are they?

Because for a lot of people, postpartum looks more like skin that’s somehow dry and breaking out, dark circles that feel permanent, and a face that doesn’t quite match the one you remember.

And no, it’s not because you forgot your skincare routine.

Postpartum skin has a reputation for being something to fix, but most of the time it’s just… telling the truth. Hormones are shifting fast, sleep is broken at best, your body is healing, maybe feeding a baby, and your nervous system hasn’t had a quiet moment in days (or weeks). Of course your skin looks different. It’s keeping up with a lot.

The advice around this is often a bit… optimistic. “Just take five minutes for your routine.” Five minutes where? Between feeds? During the nap you might also use to eat, shower, or sit in silence and remember who you are?

As a doula, I see this all the time. This isn’t a routine problem. It’s a capacity problem. And adding more steps to your day doesn’t solve that.

There is a kind of postpartum glow, but it doesn’t come from a serum. It shows up after a stretch of sleep that feels almost illegal, or when someone hands you food without asking you to make a decision, or when your body gets a moment where it’s not being touched, climbed on, or needed. That exhale — that’s the glow. When your nervous system settles, your body follows. Skin included.

If you’re thinking about skincare right now, it helps to shift out of “routine” mode and into something more realistic. Washing your face when you remember counts. Using one product that actually feels good counts. Keeping things simple enough that you’ll still do it on a low-capacity day — that’s what makes it sustainable. And on some days, doing nothing at all also counts.

When clients bring this up, it’s rarely about vanity. It’s about wanting to feel like themselves again. And that doesn’t come from doing more. It comes from being supported. From having someone hold the baby so you can shower without rushing. From having your basic needs met before anyone suggests adding another step.

Postpartum isn’t a bounce-back phase. It’s a rebuilding one. Your body is recalibrating, your hormones are shifting, your nervous system is adjusting to a completely new reality. Your skin is part of that — not separate from it.

So if you’re not feeling particularly “glowy” right now, it doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong.

It just means you’re in postpartum.

And the glow can wait.

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HI! I’m Alix, the founder of TENDER.LY, where I provide compassionate, judgment-free support to growing families. With a background in fertility, postpartum care, infant feeding, and mental health first aid, I specialize in supporting neurodivergent parents as they navigate pregnancy, birth, and the early years of parenthood. My approach is all about meeting families where they are, offering ADHD-friendly strategies, and helping parents feel more confident and supported in their journey.

Looking for personalized support? Let’s connect! Follow me @lovetender.ly_doula